Shortly after Noah died and I was faced with “real life” (like, what even is that?) – I realized I was a little afraid of leaving the house. The day before we left to our anniversary getaway in Clearwater, I started to feel anxious about facing people who did not know the situation. In my mind, everyone at the hospital was nice (except for the ER) because they knew. I kept getting images of the person at the front desk of the hotel being so mean while checking in.

Then, I was pleasantly surprised throughout the trip. The first person to surprise me was the host at a local Cuban restaurant (with the best breakfast in the world). He was extremely nice, smiled and gave us the first booth. He joked with us that we could keep the tip left on the table from the previous customer. He was just kind.

Then we drove to the hotel, about four hours from our home and took a wrong turn and ended up taking the long way. If you know me, you know I used to be the most controlling person during trips. I would write down and plan every single place we would eat and “have fun” at.

This trip, for obvious reasons, was different. I didn’t know or plan anything. I turned and saw a Bahama Breeze in Tampa with a waterfront view and thought, “Let’s eat there”.

Everyone was so nice, we were seated at a great table overlooking the water and we had an amazing guy named Nick as our waiter. Nick went out of his way to explain the menu and be extra super kind.

At the end of the meal, after he talked to Jon about his work (they even talked about Minecraft too, which Jon loves), we knew we needed to let him know how much his kindness meant to us.

We asked him if waiters got the keep their own tip or if they split it, he said he would get it, but Jon told him, “I want to send you the tip via PayPal.” We explained where we were coming from and how his kindness made our night. He shook our hands and told us he, too, went through something similar. We sent him an 80% tip via PayPal. What is interesting is that when we got to the hotel, we had the same exact amount of food credit because we booked through a promotional website. God gives restitution in the most amazing ways.

The same thing happened with the lady at the hotel lobby when we checked in. She asked us if we wanted a higher room and we said yes and she said, “I gave you the best room, the view is very pretty from up there.” She didn’t know what we were going through. I started crying and told her. She cried too…

This was a recurring theme throughout the vacation: the ladies at the spa, the valet, the people at the stores at the mall. All of them were so extra nice. I thought, “Either every single person knows, or we are wearing a sign, or this place happens to have the nicest people in the world!” Turns out it was God showing me an important lesson.

My Lesson

I work at a university advising students. I have to admit, as much as I try, I am not always the nicest. I get tired and annoyed at having to repeat the same thing for the 50th time (even though it is the first time for that particular student to hear it). Even though I am not a “mean person”, I can be mean sometimes. I wonder how many times I have been less than kind when talking to a hurting student in my office. Ever since losing Noah, I make it a point to show kindness to the people around me. I might not always accomplish it, but at least I try to be more intentional about it.

You know, you don’t need to know that the people in front of you just lost their baby to be kind. We are all going through something. We all have a story.

So be kind, wherever you are. If you are hurting, share your pain. But try to smile to strangers and show kindness wherever you go, to whomever you interact with.

Why? Because this is what it means to be the hands and feet of Christ. Serving others does not always mean leaving everything and serving in a poor country (although that is a very important and vital aspect of the Church).

Show Christ by smiling at a stranger. Show His love by not responding in an angry manner when someone accidentally bumps into you. Love your neighbor, love your friends. Even love your hot mess coworker Charlene. Not because you are an awesome person, but “we love because He first loved us” (1 John 4:19).

The Bible says in the book of Ephesians:

Even talk show host Ellen DeGeneres knows this, as she always says, “Be kind to one another.”

Kindness is important. The kindness of strangers in the darkest time of my life showed me how much God loves me.

Kindness can change the world.